"Bye, Bye du Barry

du Bois
Miami Beach, FL

Dear, dear deluded sister. Are we hitting the sherry again? For only then could you be so confused about dates and ages, who is older and who is prettier. Oh well, you promised one of your famous recipes, Gentlemen's Chicken, for us today before the cruise and we will be waiting. And by the way, dear, modern day ships have many, many new features available like internet hook-up and running water. They're a far cry from your last sailing adventure on The Mayflower; you no longer have to carry your chamber pot to the side of the ship and hurl it.

I know you are bringing something very special to wear to The Captain's Reception and this event brings to mind the art of hand-shaking. While the shaking of hands may seem rather perfunctory, there are laws of gentleness that apply. The hand-clasp is a cordial expression of good will, but there are limits. Everyone knows, and shudders at, the woman who gives two, or at most three, fingers of a cold and lifeless hand. Likewise, everyone fears the brute who swallows up the entire hand and and crushes it. Each extreme is to be avoided. Both ladies and gentlemen always rise to shake hands. Elderly people, or invalids, are permitted to keep their seats and children shouldn't be around in the first place. At the formal reception it is quite likely that ship's officers and certain ladies will be wearing gloves. It is not necessary to remove gloves in a hand-shake. That is a old custom dating back to the Middle Ages when knights removed an armored, spiked glove before shaking hands. Gloves always have to be removed before sitting at a dinner table, though.

Speaking of dinner, we will look forward to your recipe for Gentlemen's Chicken. My, with the number of gentlemen you have entertained it must be very good, indeed.