What can I say? It was a week of unbelievable financial collapse which sapped all strength. How do you lose 5 trillion dollars in national wealth in one, short period and hope it doesn't affect your state, your town, your family, or you is beyond comprehension. I don't want to be a resort town Casandra, but I've have been pointing out to whoever will listen that way too many retail spaces are popping up empty as well as renovation projects which seem to have just frozen in time. Sure, the big ones will be completed, hopefully; one used to hear, "Oh, the banks HAVE to complete them." We only hope.

We did make a night out on the town Friday; just before we left the house, we received a cable that potential assassins were spotted and we diverted out motorcade to Halo to visit on The Baroness Seitzinger. She was in her purchased-titled glory, surrounded by handsome men, the equally handsome Edison Farrow, and was just a delight. To top it off: She wasn't even wearing her signature garish jewelry. We had a ball. Getting the monster-all-clear signal, we carried on to the planned party at Twist where I came upon Mrs. Stuyvesant-Fish holding center-stage in all her social glory. We put an end to that! There is supposed to be some sort of peace treaty between us, but I guess the tequila had set in and she, her two hands, and that tongue were all over Mr. Astor. Some habits die hard, so I tried to engage her in gracious conversation with the talk of what islands in the Caribbean were the best. A group of us concurred that St. Maartin--with its distinctly different sides of Dutch and French--was the most fun. All seemed well, until I said, "Well, in my day..." and Mamie cut me off with, "In your day was it even settled?" This seemed too much and I unwillingly said something about her "stubby fingers" molesting my husband. We had to separated for a civil amount of time. Jeremy made a surprise visit and we had a riotus night, but he returns to Columbia on Monday morning to all our displeasure. Just what are they doing down there?

Who knows what will happen in the days to come, but I would like to lend a hand in the effort to find missing people, or to be the sort of Internet milk carton.

Has anyone seen this tragic creature? She was last seen leaving a Seven-Eleven in Nashville where she had picked up a vending machine chili dog and a box of Pampers. Witnesses said she accepted the offer of the driver of the powder blue Pinto for a drive home and hasn't been seen since. Despite the bad hair, she is loved by someone (although the specifics on that complaint are a bit vague).

And there was the sad story of Rachel the pig to wrap up a thoroughly disturbing week. Someday soon the story of Peggy the Pig will come out; right now the spotlight is on Rachel.