"the" Mrs. Astor

Wednesday, May 31, 2006


Normalcy has.returned to South Beach. Gone are the thugs, the "Yo, faggot", the guns (56 confiscated at clubs), and some of the partiers themselves with 1009 arrested. On a drive more familiar with Bentleys and Rolls' we hopefully won't see monstrosities like this for a while. There was only one club murder, but several stabbings. Remarkably, many businesses finished their "renovations" and reopened or decided it was again safe to stay open after 6PM. A customer asked me tonight "How will we ever stop it?" and all I could say was, "It has to be a takeoff on the old phrase, 'You vote with your feet'. This one is you vote with your locks."


I noticed the girl in orange looking Ditmar up and down, making eyes at him and followed her to her table. They were all from Atlanta and enjoying the clubs. I gave her the name of a doorman at Opium Garden, as they were headed there that last night, and knew he would remember me from my days (or nights) at Level with Gerry Kelly. One of the girls asked if we played any Beyonce and my eyes rolled thinking of Jesse (they rolled nearly into The Atlantic). I said, "Why, yes; I think we do." (knowing too well that our kah-ween manager, Raymond--who thinks he's Beyonce--had a huge collection). We put one on and the party began.

Back to the sweet life of South Beach.

4 Comments:

At 11:35 PM, Blogger Ian Gutierrez said...

awwwwwwwwwwww
so the Gators didnĀ“t got them...
awwwwwwwwwwwww...

 
At 11:55 PM, Blogger Jesse said...

Dear Uncle Alexis,

Please tell me that when you 'played Beyonce' it didn't include playing the video of me actually 'doing the Beyonce' up on the video monitor in the bar. Although - that was my car parked out front in the Doris Day parking spot that you referred to as a 'monstrosity'. How rude!

 
At 12:15 AM, Blogger Unknown said...

It's all good in da hood now, huh? You already seem in a better mood. Flippin' riff raff. I've raised some hell in my day but I doubt I was a nuisance and I doubt I tried to steal your hubcaps...just your heart. Sweet Dreams Darling!!

 
At 5:49 AM, Blogger The INFOSEC Consultant said...

1009 arrests? That's a lot of honeymoon suites...

 

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