"the" Mrs. Astor

Wednesday, June 28, 2006



On the rare days that I walk home--those days which are relatively cool and dry--I always marvel at this convergence of shapes at the top of Ocean Drive at fifteenth street. It is a marriage between George Jetson and Art Deco with a little feeling of Metropolis, too.

The developers, The City, and The Preservation Society have engaged in a delicate dance since they decided not to be at each others' throats. The City is the great arbiter here and, as in all governments, the two other sides have infiltrated its ranks with their own agents.

The developers would have razed down the historic district and replaced it with faceless behemoth condos and hotels long ago if The Preservation Society hadn't summoned up the gay community years ago to halt destruction of the Deco section of town. The City sits in the middle, takes money from all sides, passes nonsensical codes, insane laws, attempts to hinder business as much as possible, and employs the most stupid and lazy work force ever assemble before God. The Commission just passed a bill that would spend money on decorating every manhole cover in the city; I won't sleep until I find out which commissioner has a brother-in-law in the manhole business. It's a small town with a lot of money, a dangerous combination.


Still, it's the closest thing to Paradise many will experience, especially if you like palm trees, gay people, the ocean, crazy people, sex, tourists, money, and parties. If you like all of the above, then you may officially write "Heaven" on your return address.

7 Comments:

At 4:51 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

gay people and palm trees!? i am SO there! make up the guest room, heaven here I come!

 
At 5:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gotta love those small towns with too much money. The li'l midwest town I'm from has a world-class collection of public architecture, but is dealing with a shrinking tax base to pay for the upkeep on them.

 
At 6:55 PM, Blogger Jesse said...

I personally have a stake in the manhole business. Most of my days are spent dealing with manholes, dreaming about manholes, eating manholes, walking on top of manholes, fondling manholes, cleaning manholes, and tending to manholes in general.

I admit it to be true - I am the one who had my hand in the proposed redesign of Miami's manholes!!!! As you know, I am planning on spending a lot of time there in the future. If I have to deal with so many manholes on a daily basis, they might as well look pretty! ;)

 
At 7:09 PM, Blogger Alexis du Bois said...

Bees, first room on the left.

Mike, big base, no brains. How true.

Jesse, I KNEW it! The contract reading, Jesee's Manholes, LLC should have given it away. OMG! NOW I'm the one with a relative in the manhole business.

 
At 9:01 PM, Blogger Countess Bedelia said...

I love that picture of the beautiful white buildings with odd shapes and angles. B&T sent me a pic of Ocean Drive that he took from the parking garage and I have that as my desktop picture just so that I can gaze on that little bit of heaven....sigh!

 
At 2:43 AM, Blogger The INFOSEC Consultant said...

Hurricanes, potty City Commissioners, crazed business owners, mad bartenders, and all that somehow makes a wonderful cocktail. I do so miss my personal bit of heaven... (and, of course, the rocks are there)take care of it while I am away....

 
At 5:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's awfully warm for heaven today; however, that's why I live here as well.

I've been reading your blog for a while and do enjoy it. I had gotten the idea from several of your posts that perhaps you lived in my neighborhood.

I saw you crossing the street today as I walking my Boston Terrier home from having his nails and hair done, and so I guess my suspicions have been confirmed. I think our quiet little neighborhood is the real heaven!!! I've lived here for thirteen years and still love it.

Anyway, hello, neighbor!

 

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