"the" Mrs. Astor

Sunday, October 25, 2009



The new gardener continues to bring in more and more plants; his business is aptly named Mr. Plant. I'm sure, though, that our nosey neighbors think I am running a nursery out of the front yard.

Mr. Astor had yesterday off and, as I feared, the afternoon degraded into a pool of debauchery. As if we needed reinforcements, Mrs. Stuyvesant-Fish joined in the revelry and before long we were passing out titles like lemonade on a hot summer afternoon. I'm not one to pass on gossip, but it was reliably reported by her household servants (in our pay), that Mamie woke up next to a Yankee from Boston. She had not awoke next to someone whiter than herself long enough to make her check her pulse rather than her wallet. There was a very amusing period in Ye Old Gin Hall when a strikingly handsome boy from Columbia entered and set off a social tsunami. Mamie's claws came out and pawed the boy into a dark broom closet, but it was Dr. Brad and Bon Qui Qui who walked out with the prize. We managed to stay above the fray, somehow, and awoke virtuous with a hint of piety. That won't last long.

4 Comments:

At 10:09 PM, Blogger Ed Grow said...

Alexis, that is what you get for willingly living in a jungle. Just be glad that monkeys haven't emerged from the underbrush to abscond with poor Kiki.

If you ever want to escape the constant onslaught of flora and fauna just set up shop in the interior of Antarctica. You will only have to deal with petrified, freeze-dried penguin guano and the occasional sea lion.

Another perk: you'll never run out of ice cubes for your martini shaker.

 
At 10:42 PM, Blogger "the" Mrs. Astor said...

I do believe, Ed, that you don't know my horror of every day life here. KiKi will bite anyone to death he doesn't like; you can be sure of that.

 
At 11:17 AM, Blogger Countess Bedelia said...

You really are living in a tropical jungle now! I bet that a beautiful boy named Tarzan is swinging from those trees across your back yard :)

 
At 9:58 PM, Blogger "the" Mrs. Astor said...

Countess, "Tarzan", no. More likely Jose or Carlos.....

 

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